beware divorce statistics

Beware of statistics

I was told that
More women initiate divorce than men
80% of children live with mums mostly or exclusively

More women initiate divorce, well on paper maybe – I still thinking sticking your cock in a woman who’s not your wife is initiation of divorce! 

I’m not sure why I initiated the legal divorce and not him, it seemed logical, he had left, he had a new woman and I was just a loose end, I was living on handouts from him with no legal enforcement. He told me it was over, so why would I want to stay married? Maybe there was an element of politeness? He didn’t want to publicly dump me? Or maybe he felt if he initiated the kids would see his guilt? I wonder that I conceded to unreasonable behaviour and not adultery when that’s what he was doing, but I figured adultery was pretty unreasonable behaviour.

Why would I want to be the wife of someone who was fucking someone else, of course I wanted a divorce.

Perhaps it’s more interesting to ask why men don’t initiate divorce more? Because they can appear generous with handouts as it’s not legally binding ( just don’t give her enough to hire a lawyer), because they know that they might get bored of the mistress and the wife is still waiting. Because they really don’t care? So they don’t look guilty of adultery? Because the law is there to protect and they don’t think they are doing any harm? Because they feel above the law? Because they never saw the marriage as a legally binding contract. Because having two women makes them feel like a man?


Why do 80% of kids live with mums? Because most dads want it this way! Few men contest (though they moan over a pint) because if they had kids at home they wouldn’t be able to go out for a pint, hold down a full time job, work late, go to the pub after work, play or watch sports at the weekend, get promoted, earn a living wage.


Please don’t take statistics at face value, they need to be questioned and the questions need to be questioned. 


3 thoughts on “beware divorce statistics

  1. Nephila

    It’s pretty well documented that infidelity by the woman is more fatal to a marriage than infidelity by the man. Why? I doubt it’s that men are more forgiving. I doubt that it’s about not paying alimony either. I suspect it’s mostly that men have affairs with no intention of leaving and often (I presume, like my husband) show real remorse afterwards that’s a decent starting point. Women who have affairs tend to be already checked out of the marriage. So they leave. And they initiate the divorce, and a fair number of the betrayed wives like you do also, hence driving up the women initiating stats.

    Cheating mothers tend to bring their kids into the affair and maybe that makes a father less likely to fight for them? Men are more likely to keep the “mother” separate and the kids less involved. Mine did involve our kids at her demand, and it kills me that sometimes I am watching then be happy and suddenly see her with them. I guess the dads avoided that. As for cheating men? Kids cramp their style and if they were good fathers they wouldn’t cheat in the first place..self fulfilling.


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